Money date No. 19: Sisyphean

Remembering capitalism is awful, but surviving and finding small wins

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I’m 39 years old today, and I feel little of note about it.

I’m pleased with what I’ve done with my first two decades of adulthood: travel, finding my career, financial stability, homeownership, six-figure entrepreneurship, publishing a book… But I also sense those accomplishments belong to a different world. Pre-covid, pre-fascist regime, pre-oligarchy, pre-greedflation, pre-climate disaster.

I fell victim to the lie that capitalism tells us, that we can protect ourselves from its abuse. I worked hard to find success on a non-traditional path and claw my way out of the financial uncertainty of my 20s. Now, staring down 40, I’m facing the reality that I’ll always be knocked right back down, back into that uncertainty. A lot of us are discovering this in light of the fascist turn in our country, but many before us already learned this lesson in 2008.

I’m reminded of what Helaine Olen wrote in Pound Foolish of “good savers and investors” during the Great Recession: “Americans suddenly realized our personal finances were not fully ours to seize. … No amount of personal initiative and savvy could guarantee anyone an exemption from the broader negative economic and social trends.”

This tone colors my entire relationship with money these days.

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💡 Inspired by a Healthy Rich contributor, a money date is an exercise I crafted for You Don’t Need a Budget. Subscribers can follow along with my personal experiences with money in a private space after the paywall, and I encourage you to steal my questions to guide your own reflections!

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What’s the most joyful thing you did with money this week?