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Liya Marie's avatar

Imagine if you could’ve taken out no-interest student loans for capped tuition fees. And you’d had paid maternity leave for a year. And your job as a teacher actually paid a living wage.

I used to live in the US but left for exactly those quality of life reasons and more. Like you, I didn’t have parents who would help me out and that makes such a big difference when it really shouldn’t.

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Heather Bursch's avatar

I cannot imagine. And on behalf of those who come after me, I want to keep imagining.

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JBM78's avatar

Context matters, amen. I am fascinated by the way gender roles impact our financial lives- from who choose to marry (marry “up” anyone?) to pay inequality to bearing/raising children. The smugness of “I am a better/smarter/holier person because I have no debt” stuff permeates our culture and our minds in ways I realize more and more every day.

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Heather Bursch's avatar

Oh, the "better/smarter/holier" vibe that is everywhere, still. Sighs. The comparison Dana has shown with diet culture has helped me so much; I can't unsee it now. Thanks for reading.

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Sara Underwood's avatar

I always appreciate articles that highlight how much of our financial situation is chance/fortune/context and not just behavior. I often think of this in the reverse - I was making ok money and getting by until I got a call from a recruiter off of LinkedIn and ended up landing a job that pays me more than twice what I was making - it's not that I hustled or spent time and money on education and climbing the ladder. It's purely because this recruiter happened to come across my profile and give me a call. I think of all the people I work with doing the same thing and realize how lucky I am.

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Dana Miranda's avatar

Yes! I've had similar experiences with making more money and having healthier finances, and it's hard to explain that that is so dependent on chance.

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Heather Bursch's avatar

Right? It's so easy to think that it's all about behavior and hustle, the end. Not true.

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BlackExpat25's avatar

Oh, wow, so much of your journey resonated with me. I'm an empath and my husband is an oldest child of 8 in a blended family. We played rescuer so many times to different siblings and nieces and nephews and cousins even when we had borrow and use credit to help. I used to blame myself for not being smarter with money until I found Dana's column and realized that we've all been hoodwinked by budget culture. Thanks for sharing your amazing journey and know that you are not alone! Debt is just a situation that we are managing.

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Heather Bursch's avatar

Oh, yes, with you on the effort to keep the problem the problem and not turn it inward on ourselves. And yes, to managing it the best we can!

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